Friday humour - September 09, 2016

HI

Just following the shenanigans with the presidential elections makes me
ever so grateful that I live here in Aus! I would hate to have to choose
between the candidates, although it wasn’t much better here a few months
ago either

As always thanks for the contributions Arfermo, Billy Bunter of Adelaide ,
KRP, Sea soldier, Whizzbang,  Sack and Wally. As I always mention my weekly
plug – all contributions very welcome as it takes the sharing each week
to make this site all the more enjoyable

Have a great week

Haz

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THE ROPE TRICK. LET'S SEE YA DO THIS ONE.
 Click here

Las Vegas magician Mac King has a trick that's so notoriously difficult to
figure out, even Penn and Teller have admitted they have no clue how he
does it. See if you can spot the magic behind Mac King's rope trick. After
all, it's just one rope... how hard could it be?

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A JET LANDING ON A STOOL

This is incredible.

Be sure and turn the sound on so you can hear the pilot.
 Click here


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The wife's hearing problem

Bert feared his wife Peg wasn't hearing as well as she used to and he
thought she might need a hearing aid.

Not quite sure how to approach her, he called the family Doctor to discuss
the problem.

The Doctor told him there is a simple informal test the husband could
perform to give the Doctor a better idea about her hearing loss.

'Here's what you do,' said the Doctor, 'stand about 40 feet away from her,
and in a normal conversational speaking tone see if she hears you.
If not, go to 30 feet, then 20 feet, and so on until you get a response.'

That evening, the wife is in the kitchen cooking dinner, and he was in the
den. He says to himself, 'I'm about 40 feet away, let's see what happens.'
Then in a normal tone he asks, 'Honey, what's for dinner?'

No response.

So the husband moves closer to the kitchen, about 30 feet from his wife and
repeats, 'Peg, what's for dinner?'

Still no response.

Next he moves into the dining room where he is about 20 feet from his wife
and asks, 'Honey, what's for dinner?'

Again he gets no response.

So, he walks up to the kitchen door, about 10 feet away. 'Honey, what's for
dinner?'

Again there is no response.

So he walks right up behind her. 'Peg, what's for dinner?'

(I just love this)

Bert, for the FIFTH time, CHICKEN!'


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Big Bug, I want one
 Click here 


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Bring back public hanging [XXX]
 Click here Click here Click here Click here Click here Click here
 Click here Click here Click here Click here Click here Click here
 Click here Click here Click here Click here Click here Click here
 Click here Click here Click here Click here

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Leuk filmpje
 Click here

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Heinz Advert
 Click here

Heinz Tomato Sauce............Ahhhhh!
 Remember the Good Old Days

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Train Ride
 Click here

A man and a woman who had never met before found themselves assigned to the
same sleeping compartment on a transcontinental train.

Though initially embarrassed and uneasy over sharing a room, they were both
very tired and fell asleep quickly, he in the upper berth and she in the
lower.

At 1:00 AM, the man leaned down and gently woke the woman, saying, Ma'am,
I'm sorry to bother you, but would you be willing to reach into the closet
to get me a second blanket? I'm awfully cold. I have a better idea, she
replied. Just for tonight, let's pretend that we're married. Wow! That's a
great idea he exclaimed. Good, she replied. Get your own bloody
blanket.

After a moment of silence, he farted.

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From the Old Days
 Click here Click here

In 1959, chemist Puzant Torigian was challenged by a colleague to make a
nicotine-free cigarette. He became somewhat obsessed by the idea and began
systematically testing tobacco substitutes, including kale, grape, cabbage,
kohlrabi, spinach, carrot, peanut, tomato leaves, and sugar beet tops.
Finally, he determined that the best substitute was Lactuca sativus (or
lettuce). When its leaves were properly cured, they burned like tobacco,
but had no nicotine, were non-alkaloidal, nontoxic, and had lower tar and
ammonia residues than tobacco. Torigian got together a group of investors
in his hometown of Hereford, Texas, and in 1965, they introduced Bravo
Smokes, the lettuce cigarette.

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The Bachelor
 Click here

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Links & Photos
 Click here Click here Click here Click here

Australian Scenery
 Click here

Huge VW Bug
 Click here

10 X Best Jobs in the World
 Click here

Chasing Ice
 Click here

Magician Mac King (Fish Trick) 
 Click here

Magician Simon Coronel (3 X Chips Trick) 
 Click here

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Steel Rope 1 - Helicopter 0
 Click here

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Don’t Bite the Hand that Feeds You
 Click here

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How Deep is Your Love?
 Click here

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Goodbye MV Ajmal
 Click here

The MV Ajmal, an Indian cargo ship, with 11 crew members on board, sunk off
the coast of Jalan Bani, Oman, in the morning Aug 27. All crew members were
rescued by Omani fishermen. The MV Ajmal was on its way from Sharjah, UAE,
to Al Mukalla port, Yemen, and was carrying 69 vehicles, food stuff, tyres,
and engine oils. She developed heavy list in a storm, then capsized and
sink, due to the cargo shifting.

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Goodbye Israeli Satellite
 Click here

The SpaceX Falcon 9 rocket has exploded at Cape Canaveral, Florida,
destroying Israeli company Spacecom Satellite Communications Ltd's Amos 6
communications satellite, which it was due to launch. The explosion
occurred during a trial ahead of Sat*rday's planned launch of the Amos 6
satellite.

The company said the launch pad was clear, and no one was injured in the
accident, adding in a statement: “SpaceX can confirm that in
preparation for todays standard pre-launch static fire test, there was an
anomaly on the pad, resulting in loss of the vehicle and its payload.

The explosion was a heavy blow for all parties involved: the Israel
Aerospace Industries (IAI), who worked hard on the satellites development;
Spacecom, the Israeli satellite operator that was expecting to sign a large
deal with a Chinese company; and the American company SpaceX, which was
entrusted with the satellites launch. No one was harmed in the incident,
but years of investment and hard work, were turned to dust in an instant.

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Why Truck Drivers get the Big Bucks
 Click here Click here Click here Click here Click here Click here
 Click here Click here Click here Click here Click here Click here
 Click here Click here Click here Click here Click here Click here
 Click here Click here Click here Click here Click here

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Lovefone
 Click here Click here
The advent of mobile technology, has made the iconic red telephone boxes
obsolete. British telecom company Lovefone is bringing these listed
structures, back into public service, by creating tiny mobile phone repair
shops, with a free charging service. Lovefone will start with locations in
Greenwich and Knightsbridge, and are planning another 6 boxes in London.
The aim is to have 35 locations in London, over the next 18 months, with
Franchise opportunities available outside London.

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[ End friday humour ]

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