Friday humour - February 19, 2002

     From Tony at Bluehaze:

    Yep, this is unscheduled - but the first contribution relates to
    something happening tomorrow night, so I'd better pass it on now.
    John Klimek over at CUB just forwarded these:
                          ----------------------


                          BREAK OUT THE CHAMPAGNE

Believe it or not but 8.02pm on February 20, 2002 will be an historic moment
in time.  It will not be marked by the chiming of any clocks or the ringing of
bells, but at that precise time, on that specific date, something will happen
which has not occurred for 1,001 years and will never happen again.

As the clock ticks over from 8.01pm on Wednesday, February 20, time will, for
sixty seconds only, read in perfect symmetry 2002, 2002, 2002, or to be more
precise - 20:02, 20/02, 2002.

This historic event will never have the same poignancy as the 11th hour of the
11th day of the 11th month which marks Armistice Day, but it is an event which
has only ever happened once before, and is something which will never be
repeated.

The last occasion that time read in such a symmetrical pattern was long before
the days of the digital watch and the 24-hour clock - at 10.01am on January
10, 1001.

And because the clock only goes up to 23.59, it is something that will never
happen again.

   Assoc. Prof. Trevor G Bond
   School of Education
   James Cook University Q 4811
   AUSTRALIA
                        ----------------------


An Australian guy goes into a bar in the Greek Islands. Jill, the Australian
barmaid takes his order and notices his Australian accent.  Over the course
of the night they talk quite a bit. At the end of the night he asks her if she
wants to have sex with him.

Although she is attracted to him she says no. He then offers to pay her $200
for the deed.

Jill is travelling the world and because she is short of funds she agrees.

The next night the guy turns up again and after showing her plenty of
attention throughout the night he asks if she will sleep with him again for
$200.  She figures in for a penny in for a pound - and it was fantastic the
night before - so she agrees.

This goes on for 5 nights. On the sixth night the guy comes into the bar.
But this night he orders a beer and just goes and sits in the corner.
Jill is disappointed and thinks that maybe she should pay him more attention.
She goes over and sits next to him.

he asks him where he is from and he tells her Melbourne.

"So am I" she says.

"What suburb in Melbourne?"

"Glen Iris" he says.

"That's amazing" she says, "so am I - what street?"

"Cameo street" he says."

"This is unbelievable" she says, "what number?"

He says "Number 20".

She is astonished.  "You are not going to believe this" she says, "I'm from
number 22 - and my parents still live there!"

"I know" he says.  "Your father gave me $1,000 to give to you."
                        ----------------------


In a recent interview, General Norman Schwartzkopf was asked if he
thought there was room for forgiveness toward the people who have
harbored and abetted the terrorists who perpetrated the 9/11 attacks
on America.

His answer was classic Schwartzkopf.  He said, "I believe that forgiving
them is God's function.  Our job is simply to arrange the meeting."
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